Perhaps your lovemaking isn’t delivering on the intense vaginal orgasms you crave. Your sensual aids and masturbation play might be falling short on delivering a great vaginal orgasm as well. You just need to remember some fundamentals about yourself and your body that can slip from your consciousness when the demands of day-to-day life constantly bombard you. Take some special time for yourself and reconnect with the feelings that build to a great vaginal orgasm.

First, make sure that you’re fully aroused before you begin any stimulation of your vagina and clitoris. By treating yourself to milder sensual pleasures before you begin erotic stimulation, such as a lingering hot bath or gentle stimulation of your nipples, you take yourself to a blissful emotional place as well as getting your own vaginal lubrication going. Both the physical and emotional components are essential in having a great vaginal orgasm.

When you’re ready to begin masturbation, remember that outer third of your vagina is the repository for the most sensitive nerves, the ones that will be most receptive to your erotic attentions. There’s no difference in sensation between a vaginal and clitoral orgasm—the difference lies in the area that’s stimulated to bring on the orgasm. So pay particular attention to the outermost region of your vagina.

To reach your vaginal orgasm, try varying forms of stimulation. It’s your time for discovery, so take all the time you need and try as many different means of stimulation as you find useful. Different patterns and rhythms of stroking will evoke different degrees of sensation, and you might find it useful to use a sensual aid such as a dildo or vibrator to heighten your arousal.

It’ll take time to discover what specific sensations bring you to your heights of vaginal orgasm, but once you’ve found your sensual key, you can unlock your vaginal orgasm potential at will. Use your newfound knowledge on your own and share it with your lover—your vaginal ecstasy will translate into great sex for both of you.